|Series 01, Episode 03|
|Air Date||26 November 1992|
France is the third episode of Absolutely Fabulous's first series which was first broadcast on 26 November 1992.
Eddy is going on holiday to a chateau in the south of France with Patsy, even though neither of them knows any French. After a boozy flight, they drive to Provence and discover that the chateau is actually a rustic cottage. There's no food or wine, and a chain smoking old Frenchman keeps stopping by to demand, in French "What are you doing here? They're waiting for you at the chateau!" They can't understand him, and Patsy gives him money to make him go away.
Saffy arrives a day or two later to rescue them; Bubble comes along because she's supposed to deliver an urgent message concerning Eddy's home decorating business, but she forgets all about it. Days pass: Eddy and Patsy get bombed at a local vintage but also try some quieter pursuits, such as watercolor painting and table tennis, which Patsy enjoys enormously after she refreshes herself with a little cocaine.
Bubble suddenly remembers her mission and Eddy panics and rushes homeward. As they prepare to leave the cottage, the old Frenchman stops by and repeats his message to Bubble, who understands perfectly. Later, British Customs detains the whole party when a bag containing white powder is found in Patsy's luggage, but they are freed with a warning when the powder turns out to be 'a perfectly harmless, innocent substance'. Patsy, instead of being relieved, is horrified as she paid a huge amount of money for that substance, and that she enjoyed playing table tennis without being on drugs.
- Geoff McGivern (Customs Officer)
- Juliette Mole (Air Hostess)
- Robert Ripa (Old Frenchman)